Or do you think we are a little obsessed with socialization here in the US? Do we not allow people to have that space, to be introverted when they feel the need to be introverted? Do we not allow that space? Do you think that we push people out of their comfort zones with our focus on socializing? So I love to hear your thoughts. Thank you so much
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 4:50
I would also wonder about the social media usage in Japan, because I think that what he's saying about us being extroverted, I think that probably leads to the number of social media users here in the US, because there's this pressure to, you got to show people your life. Right? Again, by way of another example, one of my Facebook friends posted something about, she never sees people's kids. We always post our own pictures. Why don't we post our kids?
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 4:54
People have to understand and be aware of the fact that the world we live in today is not the world we grew up in 30 years ago. To your point about social media use. Now, Japan is not a communist country, but I know in countries like China, they very heavily regulate social media use. They don't even allow them to use Google, let alone Facebook and Instagram
Erica Jean
@HeyItsErica · 3:38
Hi, Tanya. A very wonderful swell. And I think we are in America. We're just too aggressively extroverted. And it starts in school, where the teacher forces you to work in groups, force you to stand up in front of the class to speak, force you to raise your hand and dissipate so that you can get your participation points. A lot of our childhood and into adulthood life is stamped with extroverted behaviors. Anything outside of that is deemed social anxiety or antisocial or hermit
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 4:23
Because we have been through social media and other outlets, we have been conditioned to believe that every minute of our day needs to be allocated to some activity. We need to be doing something from the time we wake up to the time we go to sleep at night. And so I love how the Japanese, they respect personal space and they respect the fact that you're not going to accept every invitation. And that's okay. You're not going to always want to chat
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 3:24
Hey, Tanya. I wanted to circle back real quick because we're talking about people putting pictures of their kids up and all the things that could happen. I remember a few years ago, there was a picture Kim Kardashian had posted with their daughter, northwest. And I don't even follow Kim like that or Kanye, but somehow I saw across my feed, and it was a picture of her. I think she was wearing a Halloween costume
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:43
You're going to order. Whoever's having the dinner is going to order, or whoever's cooking, they're going to cook it, and you're going to eat as a family. It's going to be a big dish, and all of y'all are gonna eat off of it. That's something we Americans do not like. We like picking our own foods at restaurants, but that's not what happens in Japan. In Japan, they still party. It's still important to them
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Cheyonia Wade
@Chey · 4:45
And then I was like, oh, it's the calmness. It's the silence. You go into american restaurants, it's noisy, it's loud. Everyone's kihi and Taka. But when you go a lot of times to, especially if you go to a little small asian mom and pop spot, it's quiet, they don't talk. It's very minimum when you come in, we need basics. How many people. All right
Gary Brown
@garyplaysbone · 4:10
But I noticed there were some american kids that were running into the train, grabbing the paper advertisements that were hanging from the ceiling of the train. They had advertisements for local restaurants, magazines. They would tear them down. And this happened once, and I thought, isn't that like, american kids just causing some getting out there and causing a little trouble? And I thought, yeah, maybe that's one thing that came to mind when I heard overly extroverted
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 3:27
New York versus queens, New York versus Phoenix, Arizona versus Tucson. Right. I think it's very regional and locally ordained, and it's just cultural. And also even within the context of a city, then you go to cultures. Different demographics of people are more friendlier or more engaging than others. So it's all contextual, it's all relative. It's all dependent upon XYZ. Overall, I would say that american culture probably does not surpass cultures in other places. Because we are
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:54
And so now you have mom cooking two or three different meals for everybody in the house because one child doesn't eat this one child can't eat that one child. It's just a lot of things. And so it used to be like that in american culture, where whatever mom cooked, that's what we all ate. And once upon a time, you didn't hear about all these food allergies and food sensitivities
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:21
And engaging as possible and being the best server you've ever had. It's kind of like I'm just going to be a professional and do my job. I'm going to take good care of you. But the overemphasis on being friendly and all of that, you don't have that in an asian restaurant, but in american restaurants, you're right, because a lot of them are sports bar type environments
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:38
You've got to have that volume, just like Shay was. Know, when you're in the restaurants, american restaurants are just loud. And it's because we're trying to talk over everybody else around us and the music that's going on in the background and the servers that are trying to chop it up with all their customers, and it's like you're trying to be heard because there's so much activity going on
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:52
And she took us to this place. It was like an upstairs type of warehousey looking thing. And there were real coach bags with the serial numbers and the sacks that they come in. And we got them for, like, dirt cheap compared to what they would retail as. Now, of course, this is black market. We don't know where they got these bags from. We could have got arrested. We could have went to jail. We're in New York
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 1:49
So thank you for sharing that. That was something I hadn't thought of before. And your spellcast definitely hit it on the nail. Something that I need to think about. So thank you
Cheyonia Wade
@Chey · 0:57
Where the heck do they be at? I've even went to school with a lot of Koreans. I've never worked or back classes with anyone from Japan. Where are they?
Gary Brown
@garyplaysbone · 2:03
Hey, Che, I've been chuckling while listening to your post here. I live in California, and there are quite a number of Asians who have, generations ago, immigrated into the rural parts of California for farming, for example. But today, if you live in Los Angeles, if you come up to the Silicon Valley, you'll meet, work with, and inhabit the same space as many people from Korea, from Taiwan, from China, from Japan, Indonesia, Southeast Asia
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:44
What is the message that you are trying to convey? Are you trying to make yourself more relatable? Is this something that you've been healed from? Something you've been delivered from? Is there, you know, a victory or finish line to this? Like what? What are we saying? But I think that people just want to draw attention to themselves at times and create more traffic on their profiles by giving this information in the spirit of being transparent. And so I totally get you on that
Gary Brown
@garyplaysbone · 2:39
I think a lot of us love alone time. We love to be reading books and doing things on our own, and yet we also love to socialize, as people have mentioned, but to a certain limit. And then I was going to say, living in Japan, I got to notice there was a certain kind of way in which it took a long time to get to know people. People were really generally
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:59
And he was very abusive to her. And part of the abuse was keeping her away from the people that she loved. And I was the last person she had. And finally I was gone after a business trip. But that's a long story. But, yeah, when we kept in touch, we would talk, and so I was very close. I got to experience some of the culture
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 1:27
Oh my goodness. I do that. Oh, I mean, I do that where I get excited about something and I get loud and it's really funny because my daughter, not to overshare, but my daughter does the same thing. When she gets excited about something, she'll start or she'll raise her voice days and I get on her all the time. Quiet down. I understand you're excited, but quiet down. But I do it too. Oh my goodness
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 1:13
Hey, I'm glad you are safe. I have an idea of where in the city you were when you did that. I have also visited such places and prior to becoming a lawyer, just put that out there on the record. But yes, Manhattan is a colorful place with colorful people and colorful sights to see. It is. Yep. Look straight, don't make eye contact. It's as if it's a bit of. A
And I remember more than once some of my friends and I going out to a bar or a restaurant and not having people shush us when, if we started laughing loudly or we were talking a little bit loudly, but there were definitely people staring at us, looking at us and wondering why we couldn't keep our voices down. These, you know, it's good, you know, in places like that, it's really easy to spot the Americans
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:31
Nobody's giving them dirty looks. Nobody's asking to be moved elsewhere in the restaurant so they can get away from you. You don't have to worry about that. But, yes, I can totally believe that Americans stand out pretty much everywhere they go. People know who we are by our behavior and mannerisms, if nothing else. And so thank you so much for this